Cockington Primary School

I transferred to this primary school when I was 10, after experiencing a lack of support at my previous school and repeated mistakes with my work. Unfortunately, my experience at this school also left me feeling deeply unsupported, overwhelmed and, at times, humiliated.

In Year 5, I was working out some times tables using dot columns because I didn't yet know the answers. My teacher described this as "a 5-year-old's method" and got the rest of the class to laugh at me. What upset me most was that this was exactly the sort of situation where I needed a teacher to recognise that I was struggling and help me develop my skills, rather than making me feel ashamed for using a method that helped me reach the correct answer.

Year 6 brought further experiences that I still remember clearly.

During one music lesson, the class was encouraged to hit drums as loudly as possible. The noise was extremely painful for me and another pupil. That pupil ran out of the room, but the teacher grabbed them by the wrist, shouted at them to sit back down and pulled them back into the classroom. The other pupils then started hitting the drums loudly again. I covered my ears and became increasingly overwhelmed until I slowly sank down onto the floor. Rather than being given support, I was shouted at: "GET UP! GET UP NOW!" The teacher then grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me back up.

On another occasion, a teacher snapped a tree branch in half, and as the two pieces swung back, one struck me in the eye. I covered my eye with my hand for a considerable amount of time, and another pupil even pointed out to the teacher what had happened. I did not feel that my injury was taken seriously.

I also remember telling a teacher before a test that I might need additional time because I had a processing disorder. I was told, quite literally, "Well, you'll just have to hurry up, then." For a child who was trying to explain a genuine difficulty in advance, that response was extremely discouraging.

There was also an unsafe incident during a lesson where a teacher accidentally poured borax onto my arm. I was concerned because of the potential danger of borax coming into contact with skin, yet I never received an apology. The lesson itself felt unsafe to me, and the lack of acknowledgement afterwards made the situation even more upsetting.

Even seemingly small interactions could leave me feeling singled out. On one occasion, a teacher told me that I needed to tie my hair back for a lesson. I simply replied, "Oh," because I hadn't known this was a requirement and hadn't expected to be asked. The teacher responded very sternly, "Uh, no! Not 'ouwwgh'!" The reaction felt completely disproportionate to what I had actually said, and I remember feeling as though I was being spoken to in a bullying manner.

By this point, attending school felt less like going somewhere to learn and more like something I had to survive. I would become overwhelmed and feel disconnected from what was happening around me. I didn't feel that the adults responsible for looking after me understood what I was experiencing or knew how to support me.

By my final day, I was so upset and appalled by my experiences that I refused to speak to the teachers. They repeatedly said things such as, "Have a nice holiday. Hello? Have a nice holiday," and laughed when I didn't respond. I simply walked away, feeling relieved that I never had to return.

I recognise that schools are challenging environments and that individual incidents can happen. However, this wasn't one isolated incident from my perspective. It was a pattern of experiences that left me feeling unsupported, embarrassed, frightened and overwhelmed during a period of my childhood when I should have felt safe enough to learn.

I am sharing this because I hope schools understand how profoundly their responses can affect children. A child who uses a different method, struggles with sensory overwhelm, needs additional processing time, or reacts differently from their classmates does not need to be shamed, rushed or physically pulled into compliance. They need adults who are willing to listen, understand and support them.

This review reflects my personal experience of attending the school. I hope that experiences such as mine are taken seriously and that pupils today receive the understanding and support that I did not feel I received.